Thailand - Why, Hello (again)!

Am exactly two months into my supervisory position. Love the new challenge and adore my new peers, but I needed a break from it all. I was literally dreaming about work and waking myself up at 4AM thinking about this or that assignment I'd yet to complete. Soooo, off my fiance and I went to THAILAND - the Land of Smiles - for a week of no work e-mails and pure REJUVENATION!

This is my fourth time to Thailand (what can I say...when I fall in love with a country, I do just that, FALL without any hope of recovery) and I haven't a doubt that it won't be my last. My first visit to Thailand was in 1999. My family and I were given such the royal treatment as guests of one of the most successful family of doctors in Thailand. Our hosts  gave us a huge suite free of charge in one of the more posh areas of Bangkok. The suite was complete with two bedrooms, a full kitchen, a constantly replenished platters of fresh fruits and a maid who was always THERE instantaneously the moment you desired anything. The family took us to Ayutthaya where my brother and I rode elephants for the first time, the Royal Palace where everything sparkled and bedazzled, and the famous reclining Buddha. The finishing touch to that idyllic trip was that our wealthy friends let us spend our last couple days at their private condo on the beaches of Huahin that boasted this river like pool that took 15 minutes to swim from end to end.

My second trip was exactly ten years later as a graduate student at the Monterey Institute and fellow at the International Organization for Migration - BKK. That time around I spend six months in Bangkok and a month traveling up and down the Thai boarder completing research on Burmese refugees living in the then nine camps on the Thai side of the border. That was the year I was introduced to the world of "lady boys," as they call themselves - boys/men who consider themselves women (at least on the inside). If I was a bit shy around gay guys and queens at the start of that term in Thailand, I was one of their biggest advocates by the time I left.

My third trip to Thailand encompassed the most painful experience of my life. An eight year relationship that I had thought for the longest time would withstand any of Life's challenges ended abruptly. I think that's all I'll say about that trip...

And now my fourth trip is here. If I had to pick a word to symbolize our time so far, I'd pick 'beautiful.' World travelers can relate - there are some places we visit that just stick with us; that grasp hold of our heartstrings, leaving us in a perpetual state of always wanting to return. I've three such places - Japan, Cooperstown (Upstate New York) and Thailand. I'm particularly enjoying Thailand this time around because I'm getting to experience it through the fresh eyes of someone who is new to the enchantments of Asia. At the same time, we've come during the Sonkran celebrations - the annual Water Festival celebrations when Thais celebrate New Year. The streets are filled with dripping wet Thais and foreigners alike who, armed with water guns and grins spread across their eager faces, spray (or dump) water on all who pass before them. White chalk mixed with water is seen everywhere. This is painted on strangers' faces symbolizing purification and celebration of the new year (as is the water). Many Thais use the opportunity to drink heavily and dance in the streets. It is impossible to stay dry, unless you cover yourself head-to-toe with rain gear, but who wants to do that in such balmy weather (April is the hottest month of the year here).

Tomorrow we head to Krabi  - a place I have always wanted to visit because of its clear waters and gigantic egg-shaped bolders that have some how erected themselves prominently along the shallow shoreline. 

On how many recent occasions have I simply wanted to WRITE. Indeed, there is so much I yearn to write about and yet, at the end of the day, don't because so much of it is either work related or too personal in nature. 

Dream Apartment

Isn't it interesting what we are willing to put up with in order to do the things we love. Because I love Kenya and because I adore a certain man, I'm able to cope with being how many thousands of miles from my parents and brother despite missing them dearly. We just moved into my dream apartment. We have to take cold bucket baths while the maintenance guy gets around to increasing water pressure so we actually have water coming out of the shower heads, but am I complaining?? I am all smiles and excitement because we have all this SPACE now to put Bryan's gizmos and my "artifacts!" I was exhausted yesterday evening. Bryan was out with friends and my droopy eyes were telling me I should sleep "now now" despite the hour. Regardless, I was up till Bryan came home at 1:30, organizing the kitchen and and fussing with this and that. What a dedicated housewife I have discovered within myself! :p

Blues blues 飛んで行け！！

Lately some pretty heartbreaking disappointments (or is it better to call them "challenges?") have plunged into my life. I am struggling to stay optimistic and leaning ever more heavily on my job and friends to keep my head above water. 

Why work? My job makes sense. It's less of a job than something I simply enjoy doing each day. I know what to expect, I'm learning something everyday, I have a new supervisor who I respect and love working with... Work keeps my mind occupied, makes me feel productive, and just generally serves as a temporary relief from the torments of my heart. Oh, and the work we do at my org...all of it, at the end of the day, is for such a worthy cause.

My second saving grace is just as simple as the first - girlfriends. It's been just recently that I've truly begun to appreciate having really good girlfriends in my life. I'm learning these days however that when it comes to somethings, guy friends just don't cut it. I'm left flabbergasted at times - guys, best buddy-type-of-guys...as sweet as they can be, are just tuned into a different wave length or something.  Anyway, five of my girlfriends in particular have unwittingly shown me so much kindness lately despite not really having a full idea of what I'm going through. God, I'm so grateful that I have been blessed with friends like that...they fill my days with smiles that may not otherwise be there. 

God, I hope things take a turn for the better soon. Good night, world. 

Meet Jasper

Meet Jasper - an African Grey, commonly thought by avian experts to be the most intelligent bird in the world. Jasper came into our lives three days ago. He was found by a mutual friend in downtown Nairobi looking very lost and confused. He was obviously somebody's former pet because of his tame, eager-to-please nature. This friend of ours wasn't sure how she'd be able to care for such a bird and thus put him up for adoption. My boyfriend then surprised me by bringing him into my life as a gift this past Friday.

GOD, what an awe-inspiring bird. I've had birds my whole life, but only the small variety. I've always admired folks who got to live with parrots, but never thought I'd actually have the opportunity to care for one myself...but now, here Jasper is. He's sitting on my lap now looking spaced out, lost in thought and content. My boyfriend and I already have several little birds - two cockatiels and a bunch of parakeets (though we agreed to put two up for adoption since our house is getting a bit too feathery these days :p) so we've become accustomed to bird song filling our the air of our small apartment. Jasper is literally 10 times larger than our parakeets (see above pic) so my initial fear was that he may prove to be loud and occasionally obnoxious (cockatiels, for instance, can be so noisy when they're grumpy), but the big guy barely lets out a peep! He's obviously wise. We are constantly finding him deep in thought, slowly studying his surroundings. He seems to know a bunch of English words and looks at you thoughtfully when you try teaching him new words (as if he's committing the new words to memory). And, God is he amorous! His favorite thing to do is to snuggle up against your warmth and to get his neck rubbed. He makes this purring sound that makes your heart melt! Anyway, I am beyond excited about this new addition to our household. If only I could take him with me on my upcoming holiday to New York and Japan...!

Pain Free: Day one

What a peaceful day of off and on rain showers, reading, jokes, bird song and laughter. And for the first time in, I can't even RECALL how long, no headaches or migraines! I've been having these chronic headaches for the past several months that quickly escalate into this awful migraine should I attempt any sort of exertion - even speed walking! I went running with a girlfriend a month or so back only to be in bed right after with a migraine that refused to go away for almost 72 hours. The following week, stubborn me attended a zumba class with another girlfriend only to get another migraine. It was awful having them all the time because I treasure healthy living and exercise is an integral part of that! Last month, after three weeks of field work in Rwanda, I finally caved and contacted a neurologist/friend of my mother in the States. Talking with him was a huge relief because even though he wasn't able to examine me in person, he helped me to understand what symptoms could possible mean what and what sort of treatments I should consider. Honestly, in the back of my head I had been worried about having a tumor or something because, seriously, who has headaches EVERY DAY?! But the neurologist explained that should I have a tumor, I would be experiencing bad migraines in the morning that got better as each day progressed. Furthermore, sudden "thunderclap headaches" would by symptomatic of an aneurysm. Had I not been in a public place during that phonecall, I would have done a little happy dance at the realization that my headaches meant nothing serious. Nevertheless, my headaches remained a significant frustration for me, especially when they worsened into migraines which would often last for days at a time and wouldn't be alleviated by the typical medicines such as Excedrin Migraine or Panadol. The neurologist told me that there are several ways to treat migraines, but admitted that exercise-induced migraines like mine are much harder to treat. The neurologist suggested that I take low-dose beta blockers which basically slow your heart beat down keeping blood from rushing to your brain every time you try to exercise, which is GREAT because I feel like that's my main problem. When I get my migraines, I feel like blood is pulsating in my head causing it to throb like I can't explain (I have literally crawled to bed during some of these attacks).  

Anyway, today is my second day on beta blockers and I am happy to say that this is my first day in months that I didn't wake up, and go through my day, with a throbbing head. It has been such a liberating feeling. I'm not feeling soooo gutsy as to go for a run or do zumba yet, but I can tell you I'm feeling optimistic. 

Can'to supi-ku Ingurisshu (Can't speak English)

Saw this advert and found myself shaking my head with empathetic exasperation. I found this advertisement on Alc Space (an incredibly useful Japanese-English online dictionary, btw) for the well-known language learning software, Rosetta Stone. It is geared towards the Japanese who've scored well on their English exams, but still can't seem to speak English. I spent years and years in Japan before moving to Africa, 2 years of which I spent as an Japanese-English interpreter/liaison/English instructor. Teaching at the kindergarten and elementary school level was honestly a wonderful, rewarding experience. Teaching at the middle school and high school level however often left me exasperated at the way English was being taught. Like many places in the world, the type and quality of school that you are able to advance to is dependent on the grades you received on the national exam. In comparison, in the U.S. (my "Country of Origin" as we, refugee resettlement folk put it),  entrance into higher learning (be it high school, university or grad school) is based on a wider range of, let me call them, "capability measures," such as extracurricular activities, final grades on not just the SAT (our version of the national exam), but also final grades in individual courses, personal interviews, internship and conference experience, language ability, travel experience, work experience, publications, letters of recommendations, etc. Because so much importance is put on a Japanese student's score on the national exam, there tends to not be as much focus on creativity, or in the instance of language instruction - pronunciation and conversational comprehension and ability. English is one of the main subjects on the Japanese National Exam, but being able to comprehensibly communicate in verbal English is not tested. The result? Japanese students focus mostly on written English. They excel at grammar patterns, for instance, and spelling. But speaking and comprehending a native speaker of English? Good luck. It's a shame too because Japan is such a wealthy country that does so much GOOD in the world. If the majority of the population could actually verbally communicate in English (past basic communication), imagine what that would do for their economy, for their "reach" in the world, for tourism and so on!? When I was teaching in Japan, middle and high school students were being taught English pronunciation not as any non-Japanese would comprehend it. It was being taught as it is written in Japanese. For example, students were being taught that the word, "cat" was pronounced, "kato," and "dog" was to be pronounced  "dogu."  Then I'd see the young students try to communicate with such incorrect pronunciation with a foreign, English-speaking tourist. The tourist would, of course, struggle to understand what on earth they were saying and the Japanese student would in turn lose confidence and probably pass up the next opportunity to test out their English speaking ability. My capacity to teach them correct pronunciation was limited because I visited but once a week. With me teaching them American pronunciation and their instructors insisting that they still memorize the "katakana-ized" (see footnote) version of English, they were basically being asked to learn two separate languages - one that wasn't going to be on the national exam that determined the rest of their life, and another that had no effect whatsoever. What would you do? Study the "katakana-ized" version of English indeed! Oh, Japan, I feel for you indeed...  

Footnote: Katakana is the set of Japanese characters used to write foreign or emphasized words. Like the other two Japanese alphabets, katakana is based on the syllables "a," "i," "u," "e," and "o" so words ending in a consonant such as "dog" cannot be written less they are alterted to "fit" the katakana alphabet...thus "dog" becomes "dogu," "can't" becomes "can'to" and so on. The Japanese language does not cater for "l" and "r." Japanese does have a sound that is similar, but it is more a combination of both "l" and "r," thus in the typical Japanese accent, "English" will sound like "Ingurisshu" and embarrassing misappropriations like "erection" instead of "election," will be heard. My favorite one, however, is from the movie, "Lost in Translation," where a Japanese prostitute demands that Bill Murray "lip" her "stokinzu" ("rip her stockings"). heh heh heh