Saturday 1 March 2014

Pregnant and Having "Toi"s in Kenya: Oh, the advice you hear!

As a pregnant expat in Kenya, and now as a new mother, you hear the craziest things sometimes from self-proclaimed child-rearing experts. Sometimes the "advice" is irritating, while other times it just leaves me stumped, wondering to myself, how on EARTH, did they come to believe that piece of advice so whole-heartedly?

When I was pregnant, I was advised...not to wear high heals because of my fragile condition, not to drink cold water because it would make my unborn child sick and not to sneeze because it could cause premature contractions. I was encouraged to eat for two and told that expanding hips were suppose to go hand-in-hand with an expanding belly. Now that I have had my baby, "baby experts" are everywhere I turn. THANK GOD I am not a teenage mom, or I'd be overwhelmed by all the daily advice I get from everybody from the mother of three to the guards outside of shopping malls. I don't meant to suggest that I'm not grateful for advice, but sometimes, the advice is just ridiculous sounding. The most common piece of advice I get is that I should cover up my baby, that she's going to get cold unless I bundle her up. Mind you, it is bloody HOT in Kenya these days. Poor Bella already gets heat rash just from being in her onsies and yet at least ten people per day, at least half of whom are complete strangers, advise me that Bella is cold. How can she be COLD when it's 80 degrees out?? PEOPLE, SERIOUSLY! Think about this for a second!!! I love Kenyans, I really do, but I will never agree this idea of wrapping babies up like their going to Siberia. Moms here bundle their babies up in sweatshirts, hats, mittens and heavy socks and THEN, bundle them up further with fleece blankets. The poor babies are sweating their diapers off and yet the moms take things a step further by insisting that all windows be closed - God forbid, the poor babes get a nice, cool breeze....Today at a wedding, I could see the look of disapproval and horror on some of the old mama's faces when they looked at Bella in her light summer dress. After all, all the other babies at the wedding were tightly wrapped in fuzzy blankets. LET THE BABIES BREATH, MOMS! Let them enjoy the summer breeze, don't wrap them up like you're going to encounter a snow storm any second. We get those back home in Upstate NY, not here, in sunny Kenya. :p God, how these poor babes and mums would suffer if they were to ever experience real cold!! ha! 

A couple months ago, I did a survey amongst my girlfriends who were also in relationships with Kenyan men. They all told me that on hot nights like those of the past couple weeks, they're barely be able to sleep under a thin sheet. Meanwhile their significant other buries himself under a heavy duvet. When they tried turning on a fan, their partner would complain about it being too cold. I too have had this experience, so much so that I've made several mental notes to make sure that my husband's first visit to my hometown in rural Upstate NY isn't in the winter time - he'd freeze himself silly! Anyway, my theory is that because Kenyan babies are wrapped in so many layers as babies, they aren't able to handle even slightly cooler weather as adults. What do you think? Am I right, or am I right? :)



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